It's upsetting. My chest feels like it's caving in. Lost. I can't breathe. I feel kind of guilty toward myself. I just can't help it. Why am I like this? I hate this. I'm not such a cry baby. My heart feels like it's being squeezed. If I think once. I'm such a lonely soul. That kind of pain when people you trust the most ignoring you. I'm so gullible. By the part of me still longing for them. If I could tear those 'feeling' into pieces. I would.

Why? You guys have changed so much. You guys didn't even greet me properly, lately. We used to be so close. Now we don't even talk, we don't even bump into each other like before. It's like you disappeared completely. Even you smile at me, I know that you're not actually smile. That weak smile. Why are you so gloomy? Don't you think that your aura's killing me? Your faces even show you're not interested when I start to talk about something. I always try to tease you. I want to see how your reaction will be but you only give me your blank face. Getting hurt by your words.

Why is it that the one who makes you waver is always not me? I used to make you guys laugh. It's really different when you guys avoid me. The atmosphere changes. The air I breathe now is not the same anymore. Suffocated is what I feel. Staggers. Flinches. Maybe I'm the one who to blame. Then, I'm sorry.